Sweetest Misery

I’ve crashed into the sweetest misery
I would do anything to keep this pain
Pleasurable misery sweeping over me
Love the sting pray for the burn
You are my sweet misery

As they say the tastiest foods are bad for you
You are my chocolate sweet as candy
Taste your sweet misery on my lips
I can’t get enough I’m addicted
You, your soul my sweetest misery

Stunned me caught me in your web
Holding me hostage chained to you
With no desire to run away
I cling to your pain keep it coming
How I love your sweet misery.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Sweetest Misery by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Just A Feeling

It was a feeling I had about you
The day I saw you for the first time
This tiny little spark started a fire
The flames sweep through me
Engulfing me in its confusing flames

It was a feeling a fluttering feeling
The first time I heard your voice
I had to remember to breathe
Fate deals me another impossible card
An impossible dream takes hold

It was a feeling a just a slight feeling
The day I first touched you
Electricity that connection grabbed me
Shocked me to my core
A feeling of happiness no matter the issues

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Just A Feeling by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Is it the end?

Memories of you rotate in my mind whirling, twirling, fast forward, rewind.
I miss you and it encroaches upon me at odd times and places
My oldest friend we never fought.
It scares me to think I might forget your face one day
Your voice barely clings to my memory
Can you really be gone if memories of you exist? I like to think not.
I still hold you in my heart.
I wonder if you knew how important you were to me to all of us.
It all seems so final, is it?
Maybe you will greet me one day I hope to see you again in time
Until then I will keep your memory,
Cherish our time here keep you locked and safe in my heart.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Is it the end? by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Heartache

When your heart stops fluttering when she walks by you
When you no longer smile at the thought of her
When you stop waiting for the phone ring to hear her voice
That’s Heartache

When loved ones are gone away
When they are so far away that only memories remain
When you long for their support
That’s Heartache

When you find yourself torn between two souls
When whichever way you choose will hurt one or all
When your decision will change everything
That’s Heartache

When her arms surround you and you feel safe
When she whispers in your ear you feel alive
When she touches you, you feel a deeper connection
That’s Love.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Heartache by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Random update

Good Sunday All

I thought I would update on my general life as poetry is coming in bursts that have no included today on thier list of appearances. Last night I went with my niece and my sister and her partners sister to the carnival, It was so much fun with a child seeing her face light up when she likes something was priceless. (Not so priceless when the big floats scared her aww).

So the short stories are coming along slowly, I mean snails pace slowly but stay tuned when they are done they will appear here first for your reading pleasures.

All the best people stay tuned etc you never know these days when a new poem will suddenly grace me and you with its prescence.

Mwah to all xx

Oh heres a new pic of me I am still alive see lol.

Finding Yourself

So what happens when you realise yourself?
When you suddenly figure out who you really are
What about where you have ended up?
How do you apply your revelations to your existing life?
Does it happen on its own naturally?
Must you force it into its place?
Will you hide it, push it back down?
How would it feel to embrace it?
So take a journey, find yourself, scare yourself, love yourself.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Finding Yourself by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

The Right Path

Who can tell where this will lead? Who among us can see how it will end?
Trust in the universe or destiny or probability whichever you choose to follow.
Trust that it will always lead you,
Guide you to the exact place at the exact time you are meant to be there.
I always say everything happens for a reason, I do not always see it at the time,
Eventually I see the reasoning and can accept the past
I always know deep down I will gain something positive from these negatives,
Life is balanced, you just have to look.
Observe from a different perspective.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


The Right Path by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Where Is She?

Pacing the street hoping to glimpse what she once saw so clearly here
Her life has changed so dramatically so violently
Her view is now clouded by the poisonous clouds
Engulfing her mind slowly infecting her soul
Where is her peace her light her happiness?

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Where Is She? by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Nothing

Blackened tear stains her cheek
She has again been betrayed
Her world again crushed
Her universe engulfed in the nothingness
She realises her tears now dry
She does not feel anything the nothingness takes hold.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Nothing by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Family Ties

You know I think it is possible to have many families of varying degrees in your lifetime. Biological families, friendships that feel like family, online families these days also.

My idea of what a family is: A group of people who love you, care for you, worry for you and are there for you when you need them. Biological bonds do not always create a family atmosphere or feeling, some families act like complete strangers never speaking to one an other, some are enemies with no love for each other, no care no positive feelings toward each other. Can these types of Biological families really be called a family at all?

I am lucky I have a wonderful family some live close by others live in various countries around the world. Although some of us have never met face to face we seem to do well at keeping in touch more so since the Internet appeared. But even before that we had phone calls at Christmas, letters or card throughout the year and such. Always asking how everyone is and worrying if someone is unwell we all communicate well with each other wherever possible.
Then I have my really close friends, the ones I feel like I am related to like sisters or brothers in some cases by the way certain friends have taken care of me in the past even parental roles have appeared. They have always been there for me just like my family through thick and thin, and I have always tried to be there for them I have worried for them I love them and I would do anything for them.

More recently I re entered the RPG world online, I used to play WoW and slipped out of it a year or so ago. But I found I was missing that kind of interaction with people. So I joined another site. I wont say what site but those of you who do know will have heard all about it ha ha. But within this virtual reality I have joined a clan/family and it really is just like having a family, they look out for each other, they care whats going on with other people in game and I imagine in some cases in real life too.

So I do think it is possible to feel part of many different families be they biological or not. So long as those around give you a feeling of family and you feel close to them, maybe in some cases even closer than a biological family, can they then not be described as family?

What are the other opinions out there do you all think the title of family is just reserved for parents, siblings, guardians?

© Ann Dempsey 2010



Family Ties by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Happiness?

The secret to happiness lays in the eyes of those you love
In the smiles and laughter on their faces you can create
It does not lay in wealth or greed
It does not lay in obtaining power or rule
Create happiness where ever you are and it will live and grow within you too.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Happiness? by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Serenity

Submerged in your ocean like eyes
A comfort takes hold
Calms every inch of my body
I begin to drown with no desire to be saved
A feeling of complete serenity washes over me
Drags me deeper holds me under
I will not fight
I will not struggle
Against the serenity usually so hard to find and feel.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Serenity by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Untitled 1

Breathed her in and never want to exhale
For fear of letting out her essence
It fills my lungs
Is carried around my organs
In my now excited blood cells
Filling me with a feeling
So intense and yet so soothing.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Untitled 1 by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Grandpa

Its is 8 years today since my Grandpa died so I thought I would share with you something I wrote just after he passed on.

I wasn’t there the day you left
I was alone in a strange place
But I knew when it happened
She held your hand
As you slipped away
You knew it was time

You are missed
She cried each night
She carries you in her heart
And will till her time

Wherever she goes
She knows you are there
Right by her side
Ready to guide

I respected you
I looked up to you
But you were her rock
Her light in the dark

She knew when to stop
Oh you and your look
But never will you be forgotten
And pushed to the bottom
We know you are there
Just watching and waiting.

© Ann Dempsey 2002


Grandpa by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Scars

The scars don’t show at first the wound must heal to begin with. Then the process begins you forget why the scar is there or why the initial wound was created was it just a moment of temporary madness then you begin to wonder why you would deliberately hurt yourself scarring your skin for life just because of maybe what seemed like a very large problem at the time but turned out to be very much pointless in the grand scheme of things.

How do people survive is it an inbuilt survival technique maybe but then some would argue what about suicide? What happens to survival then?

Maybe it is just accidental a way of release gone wrong or overwhelming depression and only one way to escape.

Being in love and powerless to do anything about it is a very strange feeling.
Its as if you are stuck in a hole a never-ending hole a black hole maybe.
You try to say its all ok when you know that you are being eaten inside and taken over by this parasite called love.

But love is not always a parasite it can also be like a flourishing flower beautiful in everyway eventually maybe you will find this flower and guide it to full growth and help it on its way to being healthy and prosperous, but when will we all find this the answer is one we will only know at the time hopefully I say this will be soon so many decoys in the way so many mistakes to be made and less triumphs for me along the way I just pray I have the strength to see it through unlike so many others who just give up I will never give up on finding the one thing everyone needs in life Love.

© Ann Dempsey 2003


Scars by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Trapped

I am lost scared alone,
Trapped inside myself,
Clouds of black cover my heart,
Tears of all emotions flood my eyes,
Head swamped with pain,


Why have I been abandoned?
Stranded in this place of fear,
Darkness washes over me,
Light fades quickly,
Can no one save me?


Where is my rescue vessel?
Where is my salvation?
Can I help myself?
This pain I have created,
Can I stop my pain? My anger?


Bitterness is taking over,
This life becoming tainted,
Hatred all around me,
Can anyone save me from myself?
Love has to break me free!


Hear the voice of someone close,
Begging, Pleading, come home to me,
With all my might I try to get back to the real world,
Cant you just pull me free,
Don’t leave me when I need you most.

© Ann Dempsey 2005


Trapped by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

A random rant about youth work

I wrote this when I was doing my foundation degree in youth work just for myself really I wanted to have a rant lol. I dont know how accurate it is its just my own opinion on what was happening around me at the time!


What is it that we are teaching young people in this day and age? I realised something the other day, I would never have become involved with the youth services I received had it not have been for the fact my mother is disabled, or later on, the fact that I was hanging around at the park with nothing better to do, than hang around with the people who loved to cause bother to people in the area.

These days youth work doesn’t seem to be allowed to work with ALL young people it seems to be almost completely focused on those young people who are ‘at risk’ ‘troubled’ I’m sorry correct me if I am wrong but is it not true that all young people are troubled in some way or another? Puberty is hardly the easiest of life stages nor is adolescence the easiest thing to deal with; are we adults yet? or are we still kids? Can I do this or am I too old or too young? There are endless amounts of these questions that young people ask themselves everyday.

With the introduction of these government papers every child matters and youth matters, it is putting structure into youth work but at what cost, youth groups and projects cannot get the funding they need unless they attract the right percentages of young people each day, month, and year! I know for a fact that at least one person I know works in a project that will not get funding unless they get an increase in newspaper appearances! How stupid is that? Why should the work that workers do have to be publicised, what if the work that needs to be done is of a sensitive nature surely the young people don’t want attention always drawn to them in any case.

Is this how youth work should be conducted, surely all young people have the right to access youth services without having to first get themselves into some sort of trouble, are we not teaching young people that to receive help they must first be seen in a bad light. Where did the idea that young people can just drop into a youth centre and ask for some advice or join in with some activities go? Now each session conducted with a group of young people has to have some kind of objective be it healthy eating, safe sex etc.

I remember when I was at secondary school I was in top set for most of my subjects and I did all my work and turned up to probably almost every lesson but those who were in the lower sets and caused all the disruptions didn’t do their work and didn’t turn up were sent off one or two days a week to college to do something there; painting and decorating even days off to outdoor activity places, to me they were having all the fun while I was sat in my lessons slaving away on ridiculous amounts of coursework. They were rewarded with merits for turning up on time or turning up at all, they received prizes if you like for correcting their bad behaviour when in fact in many cases some of these guys were my friends and they hadn’t corrected anything they just learnt how to play the game hide the fact that they really didn’t care or want to be there they just knew they would get a lot more special treatment if they did what they thought everyone else needed to see.

What did my friends and I in the higher sets and us who were well behaved all the time what did we get, nothing really we got our GCSE’s at the end of year eleven, awards evening came and only those who really highly achieved got an award or those who had shown progress etc got awards for effort us in the middle we just got a well done and that was that, but we worked just as hard as everyone else we worked like mad to get our grades but were given no recognition, other than the recognition we gave ourselves I guess.


We need to get to a balance where every young person no matter how well they work or how poorly they work, they all get the same attention from services in place for them if the services are not there for all young people how can it be generalised as youth work, it should be called working with ‘troublesome’ youths? Or ‘at risk young people’

All young people deserve the same attention different attentions yes but none the less they need something at some point usually.
The point here is that society, government today is moaning about anti social behaviour but young people see that they need to act like that in order to gain the attention from services that at one point were there for everyone to access now they need to be ‘disruptive’ or in some kind of so called problem area or targeted group to access it. Logically what would you do to get the service you needed…. Would you not just try to slot yourself into a group that would be catered for if you needed that service?

© Ann Dempsey 2008



A random rant about youth work by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

You

Sleep brings no rest from my flooding feelings
I wonder if with each night of sleep my feelings of love grow deeper
Each dream contains your essence
As I drift to sleep I feel you near
As I awake I find I love you more
And I have yet to even see you
I ponder these feelings in my day dreaming
I anticipate they will expand maybe explode on that long awaited day.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


You by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Our Night Watchman

To think that moon I see above me is the same moon you will see
That same moon smiling down
Our moon our night watchman
So even when you cannot see my face
Know this I am looking at that moon
In that moon I see beauty I see you

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Our Night Watchman by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Body of Love

Infected all organs with this passion
A foreign feeling sweeps in, takes over
Heat of love courses through the veins
Butterflies at the sound of a voice
Lungs long to breathe your scent
Heart longs to be penetrated
Head is powerless to fight this addiction
Body trembles at the thought of a touch
Eyes dream; envision that first embrace.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Body of Love by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Cool Waters

Cool waters from the heavens above
Wash away the intense heat of the day
Cools the sting of the summer heat
Softens the ground, earth becomes pliable

Smaller creatures emerge and enjoy
The snail relishes the opportunity to roam
The worms can surface through softer mud
Slugs move from their damp hidey holes

Humanity panics rushing for cover
Children splash in puddles
Mothers cry out to them in fear of a cold
Workers outdoors relish the chance to break

Cool waters from the heavens above
Gives relief, creates chaos
Encourages young frivolities produces rest bite
Waters of life, of death, of everything.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Cool Waters by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

The Real You

I see you through the crowd
I glance at you
You’re smiling laughing joking
But that’s not the real you

I see beneath this act
I know you’re deeper than that
Is there a reason?
That you are holding back

You must feel
Scared trapped alone afraid
No need with me
I’m an ear to listen
A hand to hold
A shoulder to cry on
Whenever you need

© Ann Dempsey 2003


The Real You by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Vicious Game

I’ve always been on the outside
Looking in
Now I’m on the inside wishing
To be on the outside
Grass was greener some days

It looked a lot better
But cracks of reality show quickly
I want to get out
Out of this trap

It’s a vicious game to play
That game of true love
A rocky path to cross
But a game you can’t ever stop

I’ve tried to get it back
But it’s useless I’m trapped
Helplessness and despair
Are my closest friendships about to tear?
I’m caught in the loop
The game of love I choose

© Ann Dempsey 2004


Vicious Game by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Thank You for You

Like a welcome summer breeze you swept into my life
Impaired my senses
You took all my worries
All my blues as if you held a box
You locked them away
Hid them from view

Like the softness of a favourite jumper
You calmed me again
Made me believe in a friend
You took all hectic troubles
You made them seem natural
You made me just smile

You got me jumping at chances again
You got me taking risks
So to you I am ever thankful
Grateful to you I’ll treasure every moment
Again I feel happy again I feel alive
Thank you for this time

©Ann Dempsey 2005


Thank You for You by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Taking Chances

Taking my chances on a love once lost,
Giving my heart over to fate,
Losing my mind over a love so strong,
Just hearing the name, I shudder,
Hearing the familiar voice I lose control,

Can it be that I’ve fallen in too deep?
Can I really take a chance and risk another heart break?
The incredible beauty I see overwhelming,
The love I feel indescribable,
Does she know can she understand?

Just to remember her touch hurts too much,
It’s uncontrollable no way to stop the rush,
Inconceivable torment rushing through my veins,
Tearing at every vital organ ripping me to pieces,
Falling harder, enduring more pain with every moment.

© Ann Dempsey 2004


Taking Chances by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

The Fight

I want you to see me, my truth is mine and mine alone.
Your truth is within you and can be only discovered by you.
I cannot help you on this quest, I can only support.
I will be your crutch at points but you must not rely on me always.
You must learn to walk alone rediscover your independence.

My forever friend, do you know how it scares me?
Scares me to think of a world without you in it
My help my care can only do so much
You need to want to help yourself dear friend
I need you to be strong and find your courage to battle on.

I am always here, always near you know this
So lean on me when you need to
I cannot bear to see you so troubled by the world and its atrocities
This world is a beauty despite humanities faults, look further
Look out upon this world and think what you could miss if you give in to the pain.

Be strong my dearest friend, love is around you
Love hides in many forms but you are always surrounded by warmth of many.
Pain is natural but love can engulf it and turn it to bliss
I know this from my own pain and suffering
You will emerge triumphant from this terrifying saga just please fight.

© Ann Dempsey 2010



The Fight by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

The Beast

A growling beast snarls at the trees
Its claws ripping leaves and breaking branches
The mighty oak and this invisible beast
Tussle in the darkness.

This beast cannot be tamed by man
It destroys what it wants
It goes where it wants
It cannot be restrained

This rampant beast on its path of destruction
He does not do so mindlessly
A purpose to his violence shines
When a small seed carried by him; blossoms to a new mighty oak.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


The Beast by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

One Night

How much bitterness can your heart hold?
How much confusion can your words cause?
I feel confused, used, abused,
What happened to us?
Why must we fight?

One night of pleasure
A lifetime of regret
Rejection upon reflection
Anger and sadness caused by your words
The words of hate or maybe love
Only you will know

How could you be so cruel?
Hurt me so deep inside
You have judged me to no avail
Where will you go from here?

One night too many fights
Was it worth it I ask you now?
Was it worth it I ask myself?
Would I return to that night?

My answer is clear
Not for all the money in the world
What did I see in you?
What made me believe you were different?
You are not you are just another
Bitch waiting to walk all over me,

One night of pleasure
A lifetime of regret
Rejection upon reflection
Anger and sadness caused by your words
The words of hate or maybe love
Only you will know

This time I have changed
I will not lie down
I will not let you walk all over me
You have hurt me now there’s no going back
You have met your match.

One night too many fights
Was it worth it I ask you now?
Was it worth it I ask myself?
Would I ever return to that night?
(Not for all the money in this world)

© Ann Dempsey 2003


One Night by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Unrequited Love

Unrequited love the hardest thing to bear,
Unrequited love what really makes us care,

White haze across the fields,
Still there are trees without any leaves,
Overgrown hedgerows roll by,
People starting a new day,
Some ending a long day,

I love her she will never know,
She don’t know,
Someone loves me I’ll never know
I don’t know them nor do I love them,
Unrequited love hardest thing to bear
All comparisons considered
We must just learn to care.

Silent tears from a lost lover,
Triumphant laughter from a
Marathon runner
An evil cackle rings aloud
From the bully in the playground,

I love her she will never know,
She don’t know,
Someone loves me I’ll never know
I don’t know them nor do I love them,
Unrequited love hardest thing to bear
All comparisons considered
We must just learn to care.

Last breath taken from a dying man
First breath taken from a newborn child
Things never considered
Love and hate ever collide?
But how do we decide

I love her she will never know,
She don’t know,
Someone loves me I’ll never know
I don’t know them nor do I love them,
Unrequited love hardest thing to bear
All comparisons considered
We must just learn to care.

Who made us see these comparisons?
Who made us deep?
Who created shallowness?
Was it our own decision?
Or a higher power beyond comprehension!

I love her she will never know,
She don’t know,
Someone loves me I’ll never know
I don’t know them nor do I love them,
Unrequited love hardest thing to bear
All comparisons considered
We must just learn to care.

©2008 Ann Dempsey


Unrequited Love by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Hello all

Well firstly I apoligise for not having posted for a while my mind has not been on a poetry track.

But I have instead started writing a new short story hence the lack of postings i still have my book ongoing but more research is needed for that to continue so in the meantime i have been exercising my creativity on a short story path.

Today or tomorrow I should be able to post some more poetry for you all as my creativity starts to flow :)

Hope everyone out there is well.

Love to all
Annifer xx

Magic

What is this magic you project,
This intricate beautiful weave,
A web of fantastic emotion,
An array of colours invade my mind.

You are my lilac, my favourite,
Your voice is subtle yellow,
Your breath is sky blue,
Your laugh is pure gold.

Magic eminates from you,
I feel it coursing through my very core,
Warming my heart, heating the blood in my veins,
Comforting my soul, once again I can breathe.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Magic by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Stuck Between Cashmere and Burlap

Soft as satin, feels like home,
I only know and feel your sound,
I do not know your touch,
Soft as cashmere am I nearly home?

Imagination plays the villain creating my reluctance,
What ifs graze my soul like burlap on skin,
No cashmere in sight to comfort my tormented imagination,
How do I know if this is safe?

Sarsenet on my skin, my heart,
Keeps me feeling safe with you,
Soft materials wrap me in them with your words,
Can you take me away give me freedom? Keep me safe?

I am lost between cashmere and burlap,
I am face to face with a crossroads in my being,
Soft or coarse, light or dark, love or like,
Wrap me in cotton a balance between my cashmere and burlap.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Stuck Between Cashmere and Burlap by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Random Update

Yes so I thought I would just write down how I am today lol, It's my 25th birthday on Saturday eeek! I had planned to go mad for it and have a mega celebration for managing to last quarter of a century.

That has not happened yet lol. I have arranged a bbq instead. With 2 friends and my family but it should be nice :). However looking at the weather report for saturday it says rain I really hope it is wrong! Traditionally though it does tend to rain on my birthday ever since I was 11.

So today I am feeling rather good, have some good research to help me get on with my book, although creatively I am having a blank day! More coffee and a workout might help my brain kick in though lol.

I do hope you are all enjoying my poetry some of it was written so long ago and is not overly great but got to share the good and the bad I feel. I appreciate any feedback you wish to give also as comments.

Hope everyone out there is good xxx

Black Heart

Could you feel the earth beneath you?
Could you see the sky above you?
Did you feel the air around you?
Did you feel my love surround you?
You could have been the one to save me

Love can never be the same
People change love, translate it for a perfect dream
Only love can break a heart
Only love can fix it again
Save me from the rigid chains of doomed love

Paint my heart with thick black paint
Never will my heart feel rich again
Never again will my heart be painted scarlet with love
Paint it black I will never go back
Tortured me burnt me cursed me

© Ann Dempsey 2005


Black Heart by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

No More Games

Look me in the eye
And tell me you don’t care
Look me in the eye and lie
You’ve done it once you’ve done it twice
Just look me in the eye

It hurts so much to see you
To see you in this pain
Trapped inside a circle
A vicious one of games
You’ve woven a web of lies
A web that just won’t break

The lies you once told
Are coming back to haunt you
You can’t escape them now
You’ve left them far too late
You will realise with some time
Just how much you’ve done to hurt me
How much pain you’ve caused my heart

Thought you were the girl for me
Thought you were my perfect match
You played me for a fool
And I believed in you
What game will you play next
That was your last game with me
No more hurt
No more pain I’m taking no more shit
Especially from you

© Ann Dempsey 2004


No More Games by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Imaginings

I imagine your lips, with the sweet taste of honey,
I imagine your skin, soft to the touch,
In your eyes I imagine I would see endless beauty,
Your hair, with the scent of cinnamon would stir my senses,
From your mind an understanding of all possibilities would comfort me.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Imaginings by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Brighter Day

I see that you’re unhappy
I don’t know what to say
The way you’re talking to me
That sad voice those sad eyes
I see that you are hiding
Avoiding all the strain
The trials and tribulations that come from day to day

I know just how you’re feeling
I love you and I pray
Tomorrow hope will shimmer
From somewhere deep down there
Your heart is full of passion
But one you cannot share for fear
Of losing all that’s dear and oh so very near

We have so much in common
More than you’ll ever know
The more I fall in love with you
The more I want to share
The things I hide so deep inside
The things I never share

I’ve lived my life in fear and pain
I know its hard today
Just look out for tomorrow
To bring a brighter day.

© Ann Dempsey 2002


Brighter Day by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

What Made You See Me

What made you see me?
How did I see you?
Started drowning in your feelings,
I am suppressed within emotions,
Caressed by your devotion,
Loving your intentions, this sweet new invention,

You captivate me,
So step inside my mind,
Tip my thoughts upside down,
To make sense of my insanity,

Living in your eyes, your mind,
Your heart it tells no lies,
Keeping me a prisoner,
In this place of happy lairs,
Contentment lies within,

You captivate me,
So step inside my mind,
Tip my thoughts upside down,
To make sense of my insanity,

So dare me to reach inside of you,
Restart the heart that stopped,
When you forgot time,
Remembered all of me,
Take my hand walk on fire,
Feel free.

Living in your eyes, your mind,
Your heart it tells no lies,
Keeping me a prisoner,
In this place of happy lairs,
Contentment lies within,

You captivate me,
So step inside my mind,
Tip my thoughts upside down,
To make sense of my insanity,

Absorb into that, which is between the lines,
Feel that great attraction,
Calling you through the echoes of contorted and distorted dreams,
Nothing is ever as it seems.

© Ann Dempsey 2004


What Made You See Me by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Only You

You are my world
Life revolves around you
Cannot think cannot speak
Cannot sing about anything
But you

Only you only you
Can get me through
Can know the truth
Only you only you
Can give me love

So many other people
So why do I get the feeling
You are the one
Whether I like this feeling
Is not important

Only you only you
Can get me through
Can know the truth
Only you only you
Can give me love

Give me love
The love I need
True love, love that never dies
Love that cares
Love to hold my hand
Just your love

Only you only you
Can get me through
Can know the truth
Only you only you
Can give me love

© Ann Dempsey 2006


Only You by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Where Am I

Where have I gone?
I think I’m still here
Deep down inside
But I can’t break free

Imprisoned by passion
Imprisoned by fear
Imprisoned by my feelings
Held captive by emotions

What happened to me?
What happened to A.D?
Why did I die?
Why couldn’t I survive?
Why can’t I find myself?

Imprisoned by passion
Imprisoned by fear
Imprisoned by my feelings
Held captive by emotions

I shine through once in a while
Show my face
I know this me
This is my truth
This will not last
The moment I need to just be me
The curtains get drawn
And there’s no breaking free

Imprisoned by passion
Imprisoned by fear
Imprisoned by my feelings
Held captive by emotions

© Ann Dempsey 2005


Where Am I by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Deep

Deep, Deep ocean of despair
Takes me far from all I know
Deep Dark Ocean of madness
Holds me under drowns me in fear
Cold hearted laughing moon above sneers as I fade
Show me sunlight save me this night

You think you know me?
So where am I now? Can you save me?
Can you save me if you don’t know me?
Can I save myself? Free myself or just fade out
Do you even really know who you fight for?

Deep Ocean has me held bound in silence
Sadness fear laps over me
Bound in silence tied by fear
Deep Ocean has me drained, powerless
Lost alone defenceless
Can you save me if you don’t know me?

© Ann Dempsey 2006


Deep by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

I Can't Reach You

I didn’t get to tell you how great you were
I feel I didn’t make good use of our time
Were you so unhappy? Were you so sad?
Did you just get too curious?
Could anyone have helped you?
All my curiosities go unanswered I just can’t not know

Can’t you hear me I don’t understand why you went?
Why wasn’t it another prank why couldn’t it just be a joke?
It’s not it’s as real as I am here writing
I miss our random chats I miss your laugh your smile
I can’t get you back I can’t get you back

I can’t bring myself to clear your details
I still don’t want to believe you’re really gone
What happened to Plymouth, your dreams your plans
You’ve gone somewhere much further somewhere we can’t visit
No phone calls, no emails we can’t reach you I can’t reach you there!

©Ann Dempsey 2006


I Can't Reach You by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

What is this place

What is this place a place of torment or a place of bliss, I cannot say for it changes so quickly. We all feel it at some point utter confusion not knowing are we loving are we hating? Are we laughing or are we crying? It could and possibly has already been argued that all of this is just natural progression.
Whoever or whatever created us must have been incredibly complex for we are complex beings. Who can honestly say they understand everything about themselves or the human race?

As I write this I feel so many different emotions at first sadness then contentment happiness anger and back to happiness.

Will we ever reach a level of understanding that makes sense, why are there so many different states of mind to contend with, is it our mission to fight this constant battle with ourselves at times I began to think is this just me or is everyone fighting this battle, and I began to ask people I know and found we are all alike whether we believe it or not we all lose and gain things everyday in our lives. I have begun to wonder how much more I can lose and what if anything will I gain from these losses.
Why do I hide behind this screen why do I never say what I truly feel is it because whenever I say what I feel it always goes horribly wrong soon after.

Was it lost friends or lost enemies that started me feeling this way?
Why do I hold back these emotions is it because I don’t want to hurt people’s feeling’s or is it that I may be trying to hide the feelings from myself?

Why is it that even when I know things are going to happen they still shock me?
Do I not want people to know how I really feel because I am scared of how they or I will react? Maybe I don’t want them to see me cry. Maybe I am ashamed of myself.

© Ann Dempsey 2004


What is this place by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Searching

Listen intently and look upon the horizon
Do you hear my voice do you see my eyes?
I spend my waking hours calling to you from afar
My dreaming hours are consumed in searching for a glimpse of you.

© Ann Dempsey 2010


Searching by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Just wasting time

So yes wasting my time here lol. Will be a poem for you all later on today.
I have been messing around on facebook and pal for a bit instead of writing more of my book, my muse has vanished if you are reading this where have u gone lol?

Have found a plug in for my IE that lets me listen to radio so now I am listening to BBC Asian network. Lol I have recently joined the fan page for Star Plus and Sasural Genda Phool on facebook I am beginning to wonder however if I might be the only non Indian person lol but i sooo don't care, I am learning Hindi though so every little helps. I am seriously just babbling now. I really should be getting on with the story and revising my Hindi alphabets.

I have nothing particularly funny to report... Oh except I went to the Chinese fish and chip shop last night and they notoriously scare me cos I went in one day and I honestly think the whole family came out of the back and stared at me lol I was only about 13 or 14. It was very uncomfortable but I do love their curry sauce and chips. But that is not the funny bit whilst trying to walk home burning my hands on the food cos they didn't give me a bag lol I tripped in my sandals on a twig lol and almost went head first into a stream but I saved myself. I hear u crying nooo it would have been far more funny had you have fallen lol sorry maybe next time guys lol.

well I'm signing off now poems later on xx

Please Don't Push Me Away

Tell me what you see
When you look at me
When you look into my eyes
Can you beat the disguise?

Can you see the hurt?
Can you see the pain?
Or is all you can see a happy face

When I look into your eyes
I can see through the disguise
All the hurt all the pain
Haunting you again

You smile as you say I’m ok
One look into your eyes
With a glimpse of your heart
I know its all a lie

No need to hide it all away
Listen to me when I say
I’m here for you to guide you through
Please don’t push me away.

© Ann Dempsey 2003


Please Don't Push Me Away by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

All Alone

All alone I cried myself to sleep I can’t do this
Dreamt of a happy place even that had hidden misery
They take all they can and leave me just to rot
I hide away and release my pain all alone
Conceal my tears in the pitch black

Slowly fading into nothing and no one to paint me back in
Left to fade in time to a mere shadow that no one recognises
All I had I gave to them to waste and abuse
The last few dregs of trust misplaced from friendship
A friendship used and abused is eventually lost forever

So I hide in the dark no one can see me cry
Not here not anywhere my weakness going un-noticed
My pain, searing deep through every major organ
Misery consumes my heart and soul my being
I stare into this mirror a stranger before me I see.

© Ann Dempsey October 2006


All Alone by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Fly

Roof tops glisten from the warm summer rain,
Sunshine reflecting the blissful tunes of the heart,
Birds fly high above the chimney stacks,
You look up wishing to join the peaceful flight.
Close your eyes and picture your flight.

Take my hand we’ll fly together,
High above the troubles we have no choice but to fight
Escape with me we’ll run far from the battle we live in,
Give happiness one last chance,
Take my hand happiness will find us once again

Clouds soar past us it’s as if time itself is passing us by,
Find the courage to seize the time we have,
No need to be afraid anymore we are free,
Pain is lost in history, happiness lives within us
Find it and embrace its light.

© Ann Dempsey 2007


Fly by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Well Ow!

So good morning I suppose lol. I was woken by a phone call at 9am not a bad time but with my useless sleep patterns at the moment it could easily have been 4am for all I knew. A phone call from India though which I always enjoy so I am in a bright mood today. I absolutely cannot remember why I started writing this, Oh yes waking up so abruptly gave me a headache and I have only just become un-zombied lol, hence the well ow title.

I thought I would just write down this stuff as a break from the poetry and to give myself a break from my just started book, I am not sure how this book will turn out yet, but I have had 2 good start comments from people I know so far. I won't be posting that on here but I will keep you all updated. I am having to push myself to actually sit down and write more each day lol, I have a wonderful new friend she knows who she is, who manages to make me get on and do it, maybe a muse of sorts?

Well I will sign off now because in my usual manner I am sat writing this procrastinating instead of 1. getting myself ready for the day 2. writing at least another page of my story 3. Tidying my pit of a room.

Hope you all arent too bored by my very random posting lol.
good day to all x

Glass Half Empty

Is the glass half empty?
Or is it half full
For me its now empty
Are you happy now?

You have drained my life
Of all happiness
Nothing left but sadness
You have drained my life of love and trust

Will I again see happiness?
I may have found it
But its love I can’t keep
I thought id found love
But now I feel cheap

© Ann Dempsey 2003

One of my now quite old pieces more of these to come this time was around the time i first started writing so probably not so great but i know some of you will enjoy these xx


Glass Half Empty by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Something that does not help my creative juices lol

update on my lack of inspiration, tip: do not light incense right next to your desk chair lol choking has most certainly stopped my poems this evening lol. As much as I LOVE incense as everyone who knows me will certainly be aware of, tonight I am very much unhappy with it lol I think I can actually taste it, i would go into detail about what scent it is but I really do not know i have a habit of going into the little shop where they sell incense, candles, gemstones, crystals, hemp clothing etc and picking up a handful of assorted incense sticks without looking to see what they are.

Needless to say I will now be more careful where I place my incense lol. pointless blog here but i felt the need to let you all know my random little mistakes which is despite the choking making me giggle.

Parallel Reincarnation?

Hmm so not a poem today yet although I am looking at what to post in the poetry sense later.

I was sitting in my hallway and could hear the TV show my dad was watching in the sitting room, some programme exploring the scientific possibilities of parallel universes etc. Science like this does tend to attract my attention easily, but the strangest thought occurred to me.

Over the past few days reincarnation has been playing on my mind and this show on TV suddenly made me think is reincarnation across different parallel universes possible if they exist and if reincarnation does exist obviously. I personally believe both to be in existence. Something to ponder though don't you think?

Also this morning on the reincarnation topic again my brain confused me again by producing a thought of reincarnation from the future, I think my poor brain needs to rest more lol its throwing out all these random theories however it has indeed given me food for thought in my new venture of story writing!

© Ann Dempsey



Parallel Reincarnation? by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Oceans Flight

Softly the hidden lights silently touch our night
Found you and so then dreamed of the oceans flight
Cannot describe the love for freedom
Cannot describe the want of you
Your gentle breeze like a butterfly soothes me
Take me for that ocean flight through a starry moonlit night.

© Ann Dempsey 2007


Oceans Flight by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Blankness

So today I am a little blank. So no poetry today although I have tons of archived stuff that I could post I am just not feeling them today. Ideally I would like to give something new.

So maybe this evening after england have played USA in the footy and I have had my weekly dose of doctor who, maybe then I will feel inspired to write something otherwise I will be searching for inspiration using writers block challenges lol.

I do hope whoever out there who may be reading my poetry entries are enjoying them? Please feel free to give feedback be it positive or negative of course negative try to make it constructive criticism. Lol

Well thats my little explanation of the day I am now off to think somewhere.

Caramel Breeze

Listen, you for caramel breeze
from raw poison life plays every worry
Secret desires to their moments
above present peace to want your smile
Lips breath voice warm
come less wild from that blind symphony

© Ann Dempsey 2005


Caramel Breeze by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.

Engraved in my mind a random train of thought.

She’s engraved in my mind like a message in stone, I can honestly say I would die if it meant being by her side.
As I sit quietly no sound but that of the late summer birds and the hum of traffic in the distance, the odd car passing the black painted gates.
I can feel it and see it summer is near, and yet all I can think of is her.
That vision of beauty and the mystery behind her.

The wispy clouds catch my attention, the birds soaring high in front of them, a plane approaching just a dot and a fading trail of vapour. I stare at the plane for what seems like hours mesmerised till it is out of sight, at first I could hear no sound from the craft but as it moves out of view I can hear the faint growl of an engine, I watch as the vapour slowly disappears, Like the memories people hold their own trail in life soon fades and people forget.

I’ve seen my life in a great new light these past few days, so close to death and wishing death, made me appreciate tomorrow for anything could happen, who knows you could meet the love of your life.

Friends and I mean the true variety not the fakes who use and abuse you are the most important thing to me, they are always there in the most troubled times and never leave you alone when you need them the most.
I hear the town’s clocks chiming 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9. Nine o’clock I look at the moon it’s still light and yet the moon bright and high in the sky is almost full but not quite there.

A thought has entered my mind, I glanced at the security alarms on most of the houses in this street and I begin to wonder…. When and how did people learn to steal? I bet no one knows. The street lamps flicker on glowing orange it’s not dark yet either, the lights ruin a beautiful night sky but no one takes note, not too many people take the time to stop and look at the night sky, so many millions of tiny stars millions of years old twinkling above, no one stops to think oh how beautiful. I used to make it a habit to lay in the dark and stare at the stars, wondering how many there were and how many were actually gone but still being projected to us.
The evening drawing into night begins to get chilly, I shiver longing for warmth but no room or peace to go in to so I sit here to finish this piece in the cool air, waiting for some serenity to arrive, when it does hopefully it will bring love and I will then and only then know true happiness.

© Ann Dempsey 2004


Engraved in my mind a random train of thought. by Ann Dempsey is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 2.0 UK: England & Wales License.